Marathon at Seaton

Four rounds of demoralizing golf apparently was not enough. The suffering extended to five consecutive rounds, courtesy of an afternoon outing at Seaton Golf & Country Club, located in Pickering, Ontario.

Had it been a quick and dirty round, I might have escaped with a shred of optimism intact, but this turned out to be a marathon event, lasting five hours and fifty minutes. I should have known better. Seaton is a fine course, but it seems to attract hordes of players that know very little about pace of play.

Things began poorly on the first hole, with a three-putt leading to double-bogey. I did well to bogey four of the next five holes, but the one I didn't bogey was truly disastrous. A straight hole measuring 300 yards and completely wide open, it should have been an easy par-4. Unfortunately, a horrible tee shot started a domino effect that resulted in a final score of ten. Yuck!

In the middle part of the round, penalty strokes inflated my score. I was not hitting the ball wildly, but I managed to trickle into the trees time after time. The thirteenth and fourteenth holes were especially troublesome, with multiple excursions into the woods lining the fairways.

The highlight and lowlight of the day came on the sixteenth hole, a 467-yard par-5. I drove the ball just left of the fairway, but it travelled a healthy 240 yards. Thinking I could not exceed about 200 yards with my second shot, I let loose with a 3-wood while the group ahead dallied on the right side of the fairway, a short distance in front of the green. I ended up hitting the ball more squarely and with more power than I ever have before, so much so that it rolled right past the group ahead. From my vantage point, I could not tell if the ball reached the green, but it was close at the very least.

I had never reached a par-5 in two shots before, so I was ecstatic, as you can imagine. Unfortunately, my joy was short-lived. As I began walking towards the green, I watched a woman from the group ahead walk to the location of my ball, bend down and pick something up. I wondered if she had just poached my ball, but thought nobody could possibly be that stupid. Well, apparently she was. When I got to the front of the green, my ball was nowhere in sight. The dingbat had actually taken it!

To make matters worse, she and her playing partners all claimed innocence. At this point in the round, they had joined up with the group in front of them and were actually playing as a group of eight! Can you believe that? No wonder the round took nearly six hours to complete!

The anger must have given me focus, because I went on to hit a couple of beautiful shots. The first was my drive off the tee on the seventeenth hole, a par-4. With the eight idiots wrapping up their approaches to the green, I smacked a laser beam right down the middle of the fairway a distance of 250 yards. It rolled up right behind them, so I had to keep my eye on it all the way.

The second great shot was my approach on the eighteenth hole, another par-4. I had messed up two previous shots, so I still had 240 yards to the green. Once again, I pulled out my 3-wood and absolutely smoked it! I saw this one all the way as it rolled and came to rest at the back of the green.

The way I swung that 3-wood for the last couple of holes was perfect. I really surprised myself with the distance I got out of it. It definitely helped take some of the sting out of a bad round.

Score: 114
Par: 70
Putts: 41
Fairways: 2
Greens: 2